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The two-year age gap pattern also shows up in adulthood, with the average age of marriage for women at 25 or 26, and for men at 27 or 28, said Ann Meier, an associate professor in the Department of Sociology at the University of Minnesota. Societal expectations tend to dictate that the older male-younger female dynamic will create one-sided pressure, and perhaps, submissiveness.
Research data also shows that age gap relationships aren’t as common as most people might think.
Seventy percent of teens date a partner within a year of their own age, Meier said, though 30 percent dating outside the customary range is still a “substantial minority.” Either way, asking tough questions and allowing common sense to prevail should allow age gap relationships to be on the same footing as same age ones.
But when the topic is broached, it’s important to make sure both voices are heard and that they understand each other well.
It’s not just one person deciding and the other goes along with it,” Meier said.
But are there greater risks to consider with a large age gap between partners?
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Ethan Bennett, 26, and Mia Thompson, 18, haven’t been affected by an eight-year difference — two years more than the formula’s appropriate “cut off age.” The pair met on the University of Minnesota campus, which offered a free prep session led by college students.“If the couple is open and understanding with their partner, then there shouldn’t be many difficulties in the relationship,” Meier said.“And keep the parents informed about the status of their relationship.In the beginning I only thought about teaching Mia ways to calm down and convince herself about her own abilities,” Bennett said. During those eight weeks, it wasn’t uncommon for her parents to see me around her, but as we began to grow closer, it was her mom that noticed first and confronted us.” “It wasn’t as bad as you think,” Thompson said about her parents’ reaction to dating a college student.“But as we got to know each other more, we found we had a lot in common, such as spending hours reading a book in Barnes & Noble and bowling with friends at night. “I’m pretty sure it would’ve been a different story if my dad caught on first. “She did warn Ethan about what would happen if he broke my heart and what she would allow her husband to do to him if he did.First it was just a couple of nice talks, and then somehow it escalated to me skipping school and sneaking out,” she said.“But really, in what situation would that even work?But it’s not a sign that the relationship can’t work.“it’s awkward enough already to have a conversation about sex …They both scoffed at the notion of a “dating formula.” ”That’s rich, really rich. (He) probably thought that this would help keep older guys away from his daughter, or something like that.” Throughout the 2000s, the longitudinal Toledo Adolescent Relationships Study by Peggy Giordano proposed that girls tend to be more mature in relationships because of the intimate bonds they commonly develop with same-sex peers.I can’t believe that someone made something like that …,” Bennett said before trailing off in a fit of laughter. Female maturity, both emotional and physical, is often two years ahead of their same age male counterparts, the study said.