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"You want to be the fast-moving car that he wants to jump into, not the one sitting in the parking lot, waiting around," Trespicio says.Keep up your long runs on the weekends even if he wants to hang out, and don't expect (or nag) him to skip his weekly basketball games in favor of seeing you.
Even if you're anxiously awaiting his call, you shouldn't be available every time he wants to see you.
"You want to create something worth investing in and make him realize your value," Trespicio says.
It's great—except that you have no idea where things stand.
He has yet to introduce you as his girlfriend or bring up being exclusive, and you're craving that "couple" title and the security that comes with it.
No need to sign up at the homeless shelter only to impress him.
Little things in your everyday life, from buying coffee for the woman in line behind you to walking your neighbor's dog, count too.If it's been about six months and he hasn't dropped one hint about where he sees this going, casually speak up, says Jennifer Kelman, a licensed social worker and relationship expert at For example, if you'd like him to meet your parents, ask if he'd be up for going out to dinner with them, but let him know there's no harm if he's not quite ready for that yet.Make an effort to do these things on a regular basis, but also make sure you're showing your selfless side when you're with him.When you're a kind and gracious person, men (and women) are more likely to want to be around you—both consciously Think beyond dinner and after-drinks for your next date."The most appealing thing to a man is a woman who has her own autonomy and strength," Kelman says.The more he sees that you have a fantastic life of your own, the more likely he'll want to jump in and be a part of it."You have to decide which you want more: a guy who's committed or this guy, even if he won't ever be," Trespicio says.Spending Saturday morning in the soup kitchen or helping an elderly person carry his groceries may be all it takes to have him calling you girlfriend.You think you desire something serious with this particular guy—but before you do anything else, be sure. Bottom line: Be in a relationship where you feel good when you're without him, but you feel even better with him. 1 piece of advice is to never to bring up the "What are we? "It's like going to a party, turning off the music, turning on the lights, and asking, 'Are we all having a good time here? "A good relationship is built on momentum, and putting a stop to the fun to 'check in' is a surefire way to kill the romance."Let things progress naturally and look at the evidence: Does he try to see you whenever he's free?Step back and ask yourself the following questions, Trespicio suggests: Do I have fun with him? Does he seem genuinely interested in what you have to say? These are likely signs he's in it for real, so enjoy being with him and relax about making things "official." "Men who are wary of commitment want to feel like You don't have to stay in the dark forever, though.